15 Funniest Quotes From Letterkenny | ScreenRant
One of the biggest surprises on television in the last few years has been the gradual popularity of the hilarious Canadian series Letterkenny. Set in the titular town in Ontario, Canada, the show follows Wayne, a country boy, and the various colorful characters in his community.
The show has such a quick pace with its humor, firing off jokes so fast you’re bound to miss some of them. And since the show delivers insults faster and more brutal than just about any other show, there are plenty of hilarious quotes from the show that highlights its unique writing style.
Updated on April 1st, 2021 by Scoot Allan: Letterkenny has become a smash hit on the Canadian Crave streaming service which has led to the series’ appearance on Hulu in the US that has further extended the reach of the hilarious show. Set in the fictional town that shares its name with the series, Letterkenny highlights the comedic lives of a small town in rural Ontario that captivated audiences with its unique dialogue and problems. It’s not just the Canadian slang that has worked its way into fan’s hearts over the course of nine seasons and a few holiday specials, but also the insulting burns and quips that helped develop a loyal Letterkenny fanbase that continues to grow.
While there are a number of seemingly common yet previously unheard sayings that are introduced by the main characters of Letterkenny very frequently, there are also some classic lines that they’ve made their own over the years.
“Pitter-patter, let’s get at ‘er” is Wayne and his crew’s all-too-perfect way to say that there’s no time to waste when a job comes up, and it’s heard frequently across the series when their plans ultimately come together.
14 “Your Sister’s Hot, Wayne! There I Said It! I Said It! I Regret Nothing! I Regret Nothing!”
Squirrely Dan (played by K. Trevor Wilson) is a friend and co-worker of Wayne and Daryl‘s who also has a crush on Wayne’s sister Katy, though he is frequently warned away from acting or commenting on it by Wayne, who is the toughest guy in Letterkenny.
However, Squirrely Dan decided to air his thoughts on Katy to Wayne once, but he quickly (for him) took off across a field to smartly avoid Wayne after the revealing comments. Katy herself usually playfully reciprocates Squirrely Dan’s subtle flirtations, though she often calls him out for his gross behavior as well.
13 “Vomit On Your Mom’s Spaghetti, Or Whatever That Talking Singer Says.”
While Letterkenny is often focused on the “hicks” and the “skids” that populate the town, though the series also focuses on hockey players to drive home the sport’s importance in some Canadian communities.
The unnamed Coach (played by Mark Forward) of the teams that Reilly and Jonesy play for has a particular way with words, which he is usually screaming at the top of his lungs while kicking a garbage can. He also occasionally tries to work in popular songs and sayings, like when he tried to work lyrics from Eminem’s “Lose Yourself ” into a pep talk for his team.
12 “Jonesy, Your Life Is So Pathetic I Get A Charity Tax Break Just By Hanging Around You!”
While Jonesy and Reilly can dish out the insults to hicks, skids, and hockey players alike, they met their match when they first encountered Shoresy on the older hockey team, who is also played by Jared Keeso despite his face never being shown.
During a vocal faceoff between Shoresy and Jonesy, the younger hockey player was put in his place by Shoresy who managed to tear down his life with a few quick words that highlighted the quick-witted insults the show became known for over the years.
11 “I’d Say Give Yer B***s A Tug, But It Looks Like Your Pants Are Doing That For You.”
Wayne is a pretty old-fashioned kind of country boy. He prides himself on being a tough and hard-working kind of person and won’t put up with people who are anything less. He is quick to call out anyone he perceives as weaker than him.
One of his favorite insults is to tell people “Give yer b***s a tug” but when he sees Stewart standing in front of him wearing a pair of skinny jeans, Wayne is forced to change the insult slightly.
10 “You’re F****** Ten-Ply, Bud.”
The show is filled with inventive and hilarious insults that are thrown around by the characters. As soon as you hear some of the verbal jabs, it’s hard not to add it to your own vocabulary for a future war of words.
When Wayne gets challenged to a fight by someone who thinks he is the new toughest guy in town, Wayne doesn’t back down. He makes short work of the man before calling him “ten-ply.” Getting compared to the softest tissue imaginable has to sting.
9 “If You Gotta Problem With Canada Gooses, You Gotta Problem With Me And I Suggest You Let That One Marinate.”
Wayne and his friends have a lot of principles they are willing to stand up for and, of course, fight for. Both nothing seems to get them as worked up as when someone threatens a Canadian symbol as important as the Canada Goose.
When the gang hears that the golf course is looking for ways of getting rid of the geese in the area, they all lose their minds. Wayne gets particularly defensive in standing up for them, adding the hilarious “and I suggest you let that one marinate” to each threat.
8 “I See The Muscle Shirt Came Today. Muscles Coming Tomorrow?”
If there is one character who seems like the polar opposite of Wayne, it is the skinny goth kid named Stewart. Whenever these two come face-to-face, Stewart tries to stand up to Wayne but then proceeds to be torn apart by insults.
After Stewart calls Wayne and his friends “shirt-tuckers”, they calmly and relentlessly let him have it. The best insult is when Wayne simultaneously makes fun of Stewart’s outfit and scrawny appearance.
7 “Wish You Weren’t So F****** Awkward Bud.”
Wayne and Daryl are best buddies who seem to spend all of their time together. But that doesn’t mean they always see eye-to-eye. Wayne is a very serious kind of guy while Daryl can sometimes embrace his childish side more often.
As the friends are hanging out by the produce stand as they always do, Daryl spots a four-leaf clover. Excitedly, he tells the others to make a wish. Without even looking at him, Wayne just laments his buddy’s awkwardness.
6 “I Could Watch Kids Fall Off Bikes All Day.”
The show is quite impressive with how they use language in their comedy. But as sharp and witty as the writing is at times, they are also not above going for the most juvenile humor possible.
One episode is dedicated solely to how hilarious farting is. Even Wayne, who is usually a pretty serious guy, admits there are few things in life as funny as farting, except kinds falling off of bikes. He admits he could watch that kind of stuff all day before adding “I don’t give s*** about your kid.”
5 “Figure It Out.”
Fans are unlikely to find any show that is more proudly Canadian than Letterkenny. The show goes out of its way to highlight the many things that make the Great White North such a special place to live and why the characters think it is superior to any other place on Earth.
In one scene, the characters begin pointing out all of the great Canadian things Americans don’t have. The idea that Americans don’t have malt vinegar as a table condiment or sell ketchup chips just leaves them disappointed. They just shake their heads and say “Figure it out.”
4 “Your Mom Just Liked My Instagram Post From Two Years Ago In Puerta Vallarta.”
The entire show is mostly a setup for the characters to roast one another with insults or “chirps” and no one is a more vicious chirper than Shoresy. The vulgar hockey player, whose face is never revealed, takes particular pleasure in chirping Reilly and Jonesy about their mothers.
His insults are so outlandish and ridiculous, yet extremely biting. He really hits a nerve when he insinuates their mother has been taking an interest in his Instagram posts.
3 “Call Me A Cake, ‘Cause I’ll Go Straight To Your A**, Cowboy!”
Lisa Codrington plays Gail, the original bartender of Letterkenny‘s local bar Modeans who has a crush on Wayne and a possibly unhealthy addiction to sex that results in a number of hilarious but also uncomfortable quotes that can be shocking to hear.
One of her milder but still hilarious quotes was one of her many attempts to entice Wayne into a sexual relationship with her by comparing herself to a fattening piece of cake. Wayne never succumbed to Gail’s incredibly subtle advances for some reason.
2 “Sing Us A Song Or Something. Do A Trick. You’re F****** Useless.”
The insults in the show come so fast and furious that the target of them barely has time to react before they are hit with another one. Wayne is particularly skilled at this kind of rapid-fire barrage of insults that make for some of the funniest moments in the show.
As the hockey players come to visit the produce stand, Wayne unleashes on them. He degrades them and humiliates them before totally dismissing them as useless and all they can do is just stand there stunned.
1 “It’s Like Algebra. Why You Gotta Put Numbers And Letters Together? Why Can’t You Just Go F*** Yourself?”
Wayne likes to keep things as simple as possible in every avenue of his life. He also has very little patience for people who do try to complicate things. This can make him a bit harsh with his opinions at times on Letterkenny.
When Wayne and his friends develop a social networking platform for farts, the idea catches on quickly and everyone wants to give their input. When the goth kids try to add their opinion, Wayne says they are over-complicating things and offers his own insulting solution.
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